Forgiveness is a tricky word.
We think of it in regards to someone who has wronged us in some way. They did or said something hurtful, and we hold them accountable for their offense.
Forgiveness, then, is putting it behind you. Overlooking the foul. Letting the other person off the hook.
But is it really?
If we still feel any sense of pain or regret or even a mild twinge of annoyance, then have we really forgiven? Perhaps the watered down version of “I forgive you, but I will never forget what you did” sort of thing.
But that’s not real forgiveness.
To truly forgive, we need to completely let go of any sense of wrongdoing. It’s the realization that nothing happened that needs to be forgiven.
I love this line from A Course in Miracles: “Forgiveness always rests upon the one who offers it, until he sees himself as needing it no more.”
Forgiveness has nothing to do with the other person. It is simply the acceptance that we give everything the meaning it has for us, and we can now choose peace with the realization that there is nothing that needs to be forgiven.